Compassion Video

So I totally stole this video from my friend Amy but it really hit home with me when I watched it. She is really involved with Compassion International and actually just went on her first trip to Ethiopia in March with a group from Compassion. The video is talking about Compassion and the impact they have had on lives throughout the world over the years. The whole video is wonderful, but what really struck me was in the last minute...one thing I really struggled with when I first started emailing with Tamrat was the whole age thing. I thought, "How on earth am I going to be able to mother a 12 year old?...I'm 24!" Despite that initial thought, I knew I was so incredibly blessed with the opportunity to be a mother to this precious boy, but I was afraid of what others might think of this "unconventional" situation. I quickly got over my insecurity about it, but this video was refreshing to watch. Just proves that it's ok to go against the grain and do something a little untraditional when you're young...

what are you waiting for...?

So Kimberly introduced me to this new song (well, maybe it's not new, but new to me) that is absolutely amazing! It's called "Walk on the Water" by Britt Nicole. I so could have used this song for the last 2 months, but am so glad I have now added it my playlist of "songs to put on repeat indefinitely." :) It really emphasizes faith and your willingness to "take the first step into the unknown", promising God will be with you through all of it. It actually has the lyrics of "don't be afraid to move"...um, hello! I'm moving! :) Probably not the original intent of the phrase but still very cool.

I feel like the Lord has been slowly working on my heart, especially over the last few weeks, and showing me what true faith really is and how He is the only constant in life, my Everything. I think sometimes Christians get caught up in "waiting on God" that it becomes a crutch for never doing anything. I definitely believe the Lord does make us wait on His perfect timing, but if it's Biblical, you're actively seeking God's will, and Christ has laid a passion or desire on your heart, then go for it! Just do something! This is a concept that took me a while to learn. It has definitely been an emotional rollercoaster since deciding to move to Ethiopia, but I know the end result will so be worth it! This song has definitely been an encouragement (and I'm sure will continue for a long time to come) and literally took some words out of my mouth...weird! And to top it off, the song played on "Biggest Loser" tonight (one of my favorite shows!). I guess it was meant to be...here are the lyrics:

"You look around, it's staring back at you, another wave of doubt. Will it pull you under, you wonder. What if I'm overtaken? What if I never make it? What if no one's there? Will you hear my prayer? When you take that first step into the unknown, you know He won't let you go. So what are you waiting for? What do you have to lose? Your insecurities try to alter you. You know you're made for more, so don't be afraid to move. Your faith is all it takes, and you can walk on the water too!

So get out, and let your fear fall to the ground. No time to waste. Don't wait, and don't you turn around and miss out. Everything you were made for. I know you're not sure. So you play it safe and you try to run away. If you take that first step into the unknown, He won't let you go. So what are you waiting for? What do you have to lose? Your insecurities try to alter you. You know you're made for more, so don't be afraid to move. Your faith is all it takes, and you can walk on the water too!

Step out, even when the storm hits! Step out, even when you're broken! Step out, even when your heart is telling you to give up! Step out, when your hope is stolen! Step out, can't see where you're going! You don't have to be afraid.

So what are you waiting for?"

Didn't you know I hide men in my closet??

So, apparently I hide men in my apartment - at least this is what I am told by the woman who lives in the apartment below me. I myself was not aware of this fact, but she swears "it's true!" I think this thought might have been part of the underlying reason for some of the events that unfolded last night.

Let me first say that the woman who lives below is me lives by herself, does not own a car (or clothes that were made after 1974), and is really protective of the 3 potted plants on her balcony. She has made these "noise" complaints on me every couple of weeks since I moved in, but they were always so ridiculous (typically she said they were at times when I wasn't even home) that I never paid much attention. She definitely got my attention last night...

At 1am, I was awoken out of a coma to pounding on my front door. Now anyone who knows me knows that I am a very sound sleeper and do NOT like to be woken up. So as I stumble through the darkness to see who it was, butterflies already in full flight in my stomach, I look through the peephole, but no one is there. I stood there for a moment, confused, as the banging starts again right against my face! (Hands now shaking.) I immediately called my sister to make sure she wasn't standing outside my door playing a practical joke on me, but she answered her home phone. (Definite feelings of panic.) I ran to my bedroom as I whispered to her that someone was trying to get in my house, also while I was reaching in my bedside table for my gun - the first time I've ever even thought I'd have to use the gun for its intended purpose. Kimberly told me to call the cops, so I dialed 911 and talked to a very rude dispatcher. I told them the situation and said I just wanted an escort to my car so I could get the heck out of there. The banging right as I called subsided, but it still freaked me out thinking that there was someone just sitting outside my door. So I quickly packed a bag and got my dog (who, by the way, didn't make a peep during the banging....I guess he's not guard dog material) and waited in the darkness of my living room for the cops to show.

About 10 minutes later, I get a call from 911 asking for the code to my apt gate....for real!?!?! I mean what if I was dying or the intruder had come in my house by this point? Would the cops not show because of not knowing the stupid gate code?! Anyway, another 2 minutes passes and I hear some familiar banging on my door. I opened the door and saw 3 cops standing outside. The closest one to me very rudely explained that HE was the one originally banging on my door! And then he proceeded to yell at me for not answering the door earlier!! He never identified himself as a cop, wasn't standing in front of the peep hole, and was about to beat my door down even though there was clearly no noise coming from inside...totally sketchy!! Basically, the woman downstairs had called the cops on me for being too noisy, even though I had been asleep in my room for 3 hours....yeah, she's crazy. She had told them that her walls were vibrating and my noise was making her bed shake so she couldn't sleep. WOW. I think she has way too much time on her hands. So then the cop tells me that I need to keep it down and then leaves with the other 2 cops, looking quite confused, following behind him.

I was ticked. And then started crying after they left because I was so rattled and frustrated with the whole situation. This is the last straw from the insane woman downstairs.

So, for my next announcement.....I am officially moving in 2 weeks! I'm just moving to a different apartment in my same complex but hopefully this will clear up the continual misunderstandings for my crazy neighbor. Bizarre, huh?

Waiting...

Oh, I am so NOT good at this waiting thing...

I keep trying to tell myself that everything will work out in the Lord's timing but honestly, I continue to get frustrated when my timing is not His timing. Sometimes I just wish the Lord would lay out the "big picture" of my life (more specifically, journey to Ethiopia) so that I could just be reassured of the end result. What's funny is that that is so not like me! I hate knowing the endings before they happen - to stories, movies, pretty much anything. I love surprises, so this waiting game should be right up my alley.......apparently not.

I found this verse on someone's blog around the time I finally decided to move to Ethiopia. I know it is a pretty popular verse in the adoption community, especially waiting for the referral, court date, travel date....actually, I guess every part of that process. Anyway, I loved the verse and knew that it would be crucial for me down the road. I had kind of forgotten about it over the last several weeks. Well, guess what just happened to pop up tonight out of nowhere.....

"For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end - it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay." Habakkuk 2:3

God is so good!!